Funnies


Jordan: Do your ears hang low? Do they turn into a fro?
AND...
Do your ears hang high? Do they turn into a pie?

Watching Pokemon, Jordan hears Ash and Brock say something in unison.
Jordan: Jinx and Jinx. Hehe. They owe eachother sodas.

Me: What's offense and what's defense?
Jonah: Defense is defense and offence is... not.


(Aiden pokes dad)
Dad: why is everyone poking me am I getting fat?
Aiden: ...yes

Mom: Jacob, you look handsome
Jacob: I know, right?

Me just finishing my report on the computer,
Aiden: Thank you! Your finished. NOW GET OFF!!
Me: You're a fly
Jonah: YOUR're a fly!
Me: I'm a lady fly
Jonah: No, you're a lady bug because you bug everyone.
Jacob: No! She's a beautifly. 

Jacob: I know why girls dance backwards.
Me: Why?
Jacob: Because, girls have eyes in the back of their head.

Mom: Who wants to take out the garbage?
Jordan: Not me.
Mom: Thanks Jordan.
Jordan: For what? I said not me.
Mom: See, you said it again.
Jordan: I said NOT
Mom: I'm sorry, we don't hear negatives.


Me: One more song, then I'll go to bed
Aiden: ....
*After song ends*
Me: I don't wanna go to bed... one more song
Aiden: Wow...
Me: I'm a child what do you expect
Aiden: No, you're a teenager. You better start acting like one.

 After we caroled to Heidi's family last week, she asked her girls if they would like to do that - to carol. 5-year-old Brooky said, "But it's in their name, Merrick.  The Merry Merricks." To which Heidi responded with, "So I guess that makes us the Silent Neiders." 

Jacob: (playing Candyland) "Mom, I'm playing against myself, and so far I'm winning!" (big smile!)

Jacob: Chanelle. Chanelle. Chanelle. Um, Chanelle. Umm.. Chanelle?
Chanelle: What?
Jacob: um... I forgot.

Jacob came up to me and said:
Chanelle, I think I'm half cat and half human.
Chanelle: Why do you say that?
Jacob: Because I made a meow sound without even opening my mouth.
          Actually, I might be a 1/3 cat and the rest human.

One day Chanelle was trying to say something (I don't remember what), and what she said was:
"Hey! Don't be mad at me when I'm laughing at you"

Jacob comes up to me and says:
Chanelle, you're such a girl.
Me: Why?
Jacob: Well, you always say "Jacob, you're such a boy" So I just said "Chanelle, you're such a girl."
And he goes off laughing. Super cute
Funny thing is, is I was watching tutorials for doing hair. He just did it at the right moment. :)

Jacob runs into the house and went to Chanelle.
Jacob: Chanelle! Chanelle! You have to come outside. The moon is really cool!
I went out there to look and it was just a normal crescent moon. Made my night that night.

Chanelle: I can't wait for 2 more years, cause then I can go to prom.
Mom: Unfortunately, you're going to have to find a way... to wait.

Chanelle: Jacob, what is you're favorite sport?
Jacob: Sport?
Chanelle: Yeah sport. Like football, basketball, baseball, volleyball, dance?
Jacob: ...tennis
Where did he hear that?! I didn't know he even knew about the word tennis, let alone have it be is favorite sport!

Jacob: What's that?
Mom: A tear. I just yawned.</>
Jacob: (talking about Mom's eye) It has juice in it.
Mom: What color juice?
Jordan: It's just clear, but it's wet. (touches it, rubs his fingers together, and smiles) I like it.
Mom: That's a tear. Water. Have you never seen anyone's tears before.
Jacob: No.
Jacob, 4 years old, definitely cries on occasion as all kids do, but he has no tears when he cries. He never has had tears, from birth. I could count on one hand the number of times his eyes had actually teared up, but I don't think they ever overflowed. It never dawned on me that when the rest of us cry we go to our room, so as a youngest he would never have seen tears.

Chanelle:  Jacob, have you ever kissed?
Jacob: No
Chanelle: Are you ever gonna get married?
Jacob: Yeah, someday.
Chanelle: How many kids do you want?
Jacob: 100, no actually a billion, now actually forever kids. That means right after I lay a kid, I need to lay another one.
Jordan: Even an old lady can beat a baby in a game.
Jacob: Chanelle?
Chanelle: Me?
Jordan: No, you're a women, mom's a lady.
(pause)
Jordan: except she's not old... yet.
Chanelle: One two, Aiden can't buckle his shoe
Three Four, Jordan just knocked on the door.
Five Six, Chanelle likes sticks.
Seven eight, Jonah got a date!
Nine ten, Mom is not a big fat hen.
Jonah: but she is a hen.
Chanelle: And I'm a chick! Haha. I'm a chick chick and you are a...
Jonah: Dude chick.
Chanelle: and Dads a...
Aiden: Turkey.
Chanelle: I have eyes in the back of my head.
Aiden: That's what scares me about girls.

Jacob patting Chanelle's neck.
Chanelle:  Do you like my neck?
Jacob: Yes, but Mom's is better, because it's fluffy.

Chanelle: Stop!
Aiden: Ooh, feisty!

Chanelle: Jacob, I luf you.
Jacob: Oh, so that means you love me in Spanish?

Heidi and Ryan took Chanelle out to eat at Wingers.
Heidi: I think I'm going to have a chicken pot pie.
Abby: So you're having a pie with chicken and pot?

Chanelle: Aiden, you poo!
Aiden: Chanelle, stop being self-centered.

Aiden (quoting a movie): "Is this vomit?" "No, it's Chanelle. But I can see your confusion."
Oh so rude!
Chanelle: Jordan, will you please make me a Bologna Sandwich?
Jordan: Sure. What do you want on it?
Chanelle: Um.. Mustard and Mayonnaise
Jordan: Okay, but are you sure you don't want any bread? :)
Jacob was having a fit and this is what he said to me,
"When I'm a dad, you'll be my son!"
Sampling of parts of Jacob's 4-year old prayers: We're thankful that we could hold bugs but not spiders and just the rolly-pllys and big ones. We're thankful that we are humans. We're thankful to not smell with our eyes but only smell with our noses. We're thankful we don't have bad guys. We're thankful we have cops that don't have weapons but some of them do.